Attachment(s): <<My Darling Fluffy>>

Commodore,

1) Thank you for the explanation regarding the unintended literature, and the circumstances regarding it's transmission. Rest assured I shall now not be holding your team responsible for the brief brush war that occurred out here after I attempted text negotiations with a local planet, and that I am willing to attest to the accidental nature of this incident in any inquiries that may be mounted as a result. My first officer assures me that DS13's systems have been thoroughly swept now and there is no danger of further transmission of the offending document from this station.

2) I have contacted Starfleet R&D at Proxima II, and they have confirmed that the BBQ sauce is indeed safe for use with minimal side-effects. Apparently my Operations Officer's condition is unusual in the extreme and the rash should clear within 4-7 days. As to the possibility of Ckorrefektians serving within the fleet in the future, I find that unlikely, as the entire species are claustrophobic in the extreme and completely unable to travel aboard a starship without suffering a nervous breakdown. I was in fact the Starfleet officer to discover this during a tense negotiation session in an enclosed facility. It was shortly after this that the Ckorrefektians briefly aligned themselves with the Klingons, although I was assured that this incident, in which seven Ckorrefektians lost their lives, had nothing whatsoever to do with that decision.

3) As to Starfleet's status, I am well aware of the Charter and it's limitations. I am also aware that many civilian subcontractors take advantage of the loopholes within the Charter to the detriment of our efficiency. I am not advocating ignoring our Codes of Conduct, merely of adopting a more flexible attitude to the rules occasionally, in order to persuade those subcontractors to work a little harder for their government contracts.

4) It is believed that the mould outbreak was the result of a freak accident involving my chief shuttle pilot, several cocktails of varying alcoholic strength, a cheese toastie and a fractured dilithium crystal, and is assessed as unlikely to reoccur. Thanks to the aforementioned chief shuttle pilot donating his off duty clothing we do indeed have sufficient mops and rags to deal with the outbreak.

Yours,

Captain CJT Olding, 217-5840-Q.
Officer Commanding, Federation Space Station Deep Space 13.